Adoption Associates, Inc: Domestic Infant and International Adoption Agency

Married couples must be at least 30 years older than the child, and will be accepted up to age fifty (no more than 45 years older than the child). Single women must be at least thirty-five years old.

Household income should not be less than $40,000, and home ownership is preferred. The family’s assets as well as debts will be evaluated during the adoption process. Documents such as tax returns, a financial statement, bank statement, and proof of home ownership will be included in the dossier.

Couples or single women can adopt from Nepal. Couples must have been married for a minimum of four years and have evidence of infertility. Prospective adoptive parents must also be either childless or have no more than two children of the same gender currently in the home. A family with one or two children of the same gender is then only qualified to adopt a child of the opposite gender. The child to be adopted must be the youngest in the home at the time of the adoption.

Each person must have a passport with a validity of at least six months and two blank visa pages remaining. A visa is required to enter Nepal. The visa can be purchased from the Nepalese embassy in Washington D.C. prior to travel or upon arrival in Nepal, before leaving the airport. At least one passport photo is required along with the visa application.

You are able to wire the foreign program fee prior to your travel. You will also need money (cash or traveler’s checks) for your hotels, sightseeing, and shopping. You will need cash for your child’s U.S. visa and medical appointment as well. Your consultant will be able to assist you in estimating how much money to take with you.

According to the Center for Disease Control (CDC), there are no required shots for travel to Nepal. However, it is recommended that you be vaccinated for Hepatitis A and B at minimum. You should also check with your personal doctor and local health department for recommendations. In general, when traveling internationally, it is best to avoid drinking tap water and beverages containing ice, and eating food cooked by street vendors.

A prospective adoptive family that has any medical and/or criminal issues should discuss them with a Nepal consultant before applying to the program. On a case by case basis, AAI will determine if the family will qualify or if it is necessary to get verbal preapproval from the Nepalese contact to proceed with the adoption plan. Some medical conditions may require support from a doctor’s letter of explanation. A previous criminal record will likely be cause for concern in eventually being approved by the Nepalese government, especially if the offender served a jail or prison sentence.

You will need to apply immediately for your passports, as they are needed as part of your dossier (the legal papers sent to Nepal to complete the adoption). Usually, families have approximately four months to prepare their dossier paperwork. You will need to secure a passport within those first four months so that your passport copies can accompany your dossier to Nepal. You can get more information from www.travel.state.gov/passport, or you can contact any U.S. post office to obtain a passport application. You will also need passport photos.

Ask yourself these questions and be very honest in your answers. If you can answer the majority of the statements below with a YES, you are ready for an international adoption experience.

I am goal oriented. Once I make up my mind to do something, I almost always accomplish it.
I feel I handle stressful situations well. I’ve found ways to reduce my stress level before I “blow up.”
I consider myself to be a patient person in situations that others find trying.
I have a good sense of humor. It helps me keep things in perspective.
Differences interest me. I find it rewarding to try new things. I like travel, meeting new people, trying different foods, etc.
Challenges make me determined to succeed, and I do not give up easily.
When faced with a problem, I become a problem solver. My motto is, “Where there is a will, there is a way.”
My friends, family, and coworkers would say that I am a loyal person.
I am realistic in my expectations of myself and others. When things don’t go as I’ve planned, I can adjust.
Even though my family and friends sometimes let me down, I can overlook their shortcomings and accept them as they are.
I am usually an optimistic person. I like to look on the bright side of things.
I like to do things my way but can accept the fact that some things are out of my control.
I have a lot of support in my life from family and friends.
I am proactive. I value the advice of others and seek help when I need it.

AAI can provide you with an itemized statement of fees paid to AAI, including your home study fee, country-specific program fee, administrative fee, and application fee. AAI can also list other expenses you have incurred, such as in-country expenses, if you can provide the agency with a detailed record of all these other expenditures.

A receipt request form is provided in your Nepal travel packet that will assist you in organizing all your expenditures. AAI will need this form in order to generate your statement.

The most common (and quite time consuming) mistake that adoptive families make when compiling their dossier is with the required notary seals. Often, families use notaries with expired (or close to expiring) commissions. Another common problem is that the notary is required to sign his or her name exactly the same way it appears on the notary stamp, and often they do not. Lastly, notaries often neglect to write or type the jurat statement that must state the following: “Signed and sworn to before me in _ County, _ (State) on __(date).”

In the dossier instructions that families receive from AAI, there is a page entitled INSTRUCTIONS FOR NOTARIZATION OF DOCUMENTS. Families should take this with them each time they are getting a document notarized. If the notarization is done incorrectly, the document must be redone, and this is frustrating and time consuming.

The length of time from submission of dossier to referral of child will vary depending on the family’s preference. Likely, the wait for a referral will be shorter for a boy and could be almost immediate once the dossier has been submitted. It can take much longer if the family is waiting for a referral of a girl and/or if the family has a relatively narrow age range requested. Once the dossier has been submitted and there has been a referral, the average wait for processing may be two to six months, after which the family is invited to travel. The child will come home with the family at the end of the trip.

You can go either east or west to get to Nepal from the United States. There are no direct flights to Nepal, so you will likely stop in Europe, India, or Qatar if you are traveling east, and you will likely stop in southeast Asia if you are traveling west. Keep in mind that each country you stop in may have unique requirements, such as a transit visa requirement. It is wise to work with a knowledgeable travel agent in making your travel arrangements. Travel Intrigue, our in-house travel agency, is experienced in arranging adoption travel to Nepal and can also work with you to arrange adoption fare flights if necessary.

Families will fly into and out of Kathmandu, the nation’s capital. The adoption will be processed in Kathmandu, and you will visit the U.S. Embassy there. Your child may reside at an orphanage in Kathmandu or in an orphanage in the southern part of the country. Regardless, we’d recommend doing some sightseeing, including a short trip or two outside of the city. You should always stay with a knowledgeable guide though.

Hiring an escort to travel to Nepal in place of the adoptive parents is not possible. The Nepalese government requires that prospective parents formally apply for adoption in person, thus requiring both parents to travel on the first trip. The U.S. embassy requires that at least one adoptive parent be present to finalize the adoption at the end of the second trip, which means that at least one parent must travel.

It is strongly recommended that both parents travel for both trips, unless it is nearly impossible for one of them to travel on the second trip. Traveling to Nepal is important because it allows adoptive families to personally experience the culture that their adopted child comes from, and it is especially wise on the second trip so that adoptive parents can help with the child’s transition and begin the bonding and attachment period to follow. If it is necessary that only one parent travel on the second trip, he or she must carry a Power of Attorney from the absent parent in order to complete the legal process.

It is always a good idea to have two traveling adults when bringing a child home. If you are a single woman, or are married but your spouse cannot travel, it is wise to bring along someone who can help you with the care of your child and with your adoption paperwork and processing. Of course, any additional travelers will incur additional travel expenses. Furthermore, the additional traveler will need a Nepalese visa and any other transit visa, just as you will need. If you are thinking of taking someone with you on the trip, you may want to check with them now already to make sure that they have a passport that will be valid when you travel. Beyond the normal preparations for international travel, make sure that the person you plan to bring will offer the emotional support you need while you’re in Nepal, and that he or she has strong arms—for carrying your luggage while you’re carrying your new child!

Even if you have two traveling adults, you may also be considering bringing along another relative, such as a grandparent or sibling to the newly adopted child. You should keep in mind that there may be quite a bit of time spent simply waiting for the adoption processing to be complete, or there may be times that just the adoptive parents will be needed for appointments or meetings. Make sure that any additional travelers will be able to handle this type of experience and that their presence will not interfere with your being able to focus on bonding with your new child.

Banking systems overseas frequently are poorly developed or unstable. Citizens do not trust banks because funds occasionally “disappear,” or the banks themselves disappear, and citizens have no recourse to recover their lost funds. As a result, personal checks and credit cards are rare. Instead, citizens pay cash. Wire transfers are possible and safe. Traveler’s checks are also an acceptable way to carry money. Any cash that is carried must be in very good condition. Even the U.S. Embassy will not accept worn out or torn bills.

A calling card with international minutes from a major carrier will likely work. You may also consider purchasing a calling card in Nepal for international use when calling home. Otherwise, you may purchase a phone card online at www.phonecardsforsale.com for family and friends to use when calling you in Nepal; this may be the least expensive option. Since you may not know until you arrive at your hotel exactly which hotel you will be staying in, we recommend that you call home from your hotel soon after you arrive. Before you call, get the phone number from your hotel so you can give it to those at home. From the United States, they would need to dial 011 plus the number you are given for the hotel. Kathmandu is approximately 9 or 10 hours ahead of Eastern Standard Time.

Families can specify the price range and/or accommodations they would like for a hotel in Kathmandu. Travel Intrigue can assist you in making a choice. Furthermore, AAI’s contact in Nepal can book a hotel for you based on your specifications. There are very nice four star hotels available, as well as smaller guest houses and even apartments for rent. Most hotels in Kathmandu are easily accessible and close to shopping and sightseeing locations.

It is best to wear slacks, khakis, button-down shirts, sweaters, or casual, longer skirts. You should take comfortable shoes that you don’t mind getting dirty. Avoid tight-fitting or revealing clothes and excessive jewelry. Athletic-style apparel is less commonly worn in Nepal, so stay away from wearing shorts, tennis shoes, and ski jackets if you want to try and blend in. You will probably not want to draw any unnecessary attention to yourself. Also remember that you are a representative and an ambassador for future adoptive parents coming to Nepal. Therefore, you will want to demonstrate an attitude of respect in your actions, behavior, and dress.

The AAI contact will either meet you personally at the airport or will arrange for your hotel to pick you up. The AAI contact will also accompany you on any adoption-related business and will arrange for any sightseeing that you would like to do.

You can take precautions by using only bottled water for drinking and brushing your teeth. Close your eyes and mouth when directly under the shower. Take Pepto-Bismol tablets every day to coat your stomach. Bring prescription antidiarrheal medicine. You may want to consider getting the Hepatitis A vaccination, which protects you from this food and waterborne virus. Choose only good quality restaurants, and avoid food cooked by street vendors. If you do get sick, tell our contact immediately, and he will assist you in getting the help you need from an international clinic if necessary.

AAI has created a simple way for families to bring donations to their child’s orphanage through the Blessings in Bundles project. Blessings in Bundles seeks to aid the children in AAI-sponsored orphanages with bundles of donated clothing and medical supplies. We have partnered with local charity organizations to collect these needed goods. When you travel abroad to finalize your adoption, AAI will ship a box of items to your home that you can deliver to the orphanage. If you have questions or would like to participate in this project, please e-mail blessingsinbundles@adoptionassociates.net. We would be happy to add you to the list of families that desire to bring relief to children who live in poverty.

The children range in age from four months up to six years of age at the time of referral.

The children referred are considered healthy, but it is not uncommon for the children to be affected by the common, often temporary, health concerns typical in institutionalized settings. Children may be malnourished, lacking in important nutrients, or suffering from such ailments as rickets, scabies, and intestinal parasites. It is also commonly expected that institutionalized children will have developmental delays. It is possible to have an independent doctor evaluate your child while on the first trip. There are reputable health clinics located in Kathmandu that offer independent evaluations for the children referred to adoptive families. If you are interested in this option, please notify your consultant prior to your first trip so that arrangements can be made.

Remember that your child is being taken away from everything and everyone that he or she is familiar with. Your child doesn’t understand your language, and you don’t understand your child’s. Under these circumstances, it is perfectly reasonable for your child to desire the perceived safety and security of what he or she is familiar with—the orphanage and the caregivers there. Your child may very well be grieving the loss of caregivers, friends, routines, etc. Understand that these feelings are normal, and try to comfort your child as best you can while assuring him or her that you are not taking your child back to the orphanage.

Children often express their feelings more through behavior than words, and in this situation, your child doesn’t yet have the ability to verbalize how he or she feels. Acting out is his or her way of communicating anger, sadness, fear, etc. Generally, you need to set limits so that your child doesn’t endanger himself, herself, or others. Beyond that, understand that the first few days or weeks will likely be difficult for you and for your child.

Actually, it is quite common for adoptive parents to feel very little toward their new son or daughter at first. The feeling of love for someone often grows out of nurturing and caring for that person over time. Love will come as your relationship grows with the child. At the moment you first meet your child, it is really about commitment rather than feelings of love. Give it time … love will flourish.

While in Nepal, it is best to stick with the foods the child is used to, or at minimum, to choose a bland diet consisting of soft, easily palatable foods. Also, try to follow the recommendations of the orphanage caregiver, particularly if your child is still taking formula. Sometimes, the caregiver will bring you a bag of powdered formula or provide the name of the formula for you to then purchase at a local market.

It is recommended that you wait until you arrive home to introduce different foods. Introducing strange food while in Nepal may cause severe diarrhea or refusal to eat or drink. Remember to schedule an appointment with your pediatrician immediately upon arriving home. Your pediatrician will assist you in determining the best time to present new foods.

Even though your adoption is finalized before you leave Nepal, the Nepalese government requires that each adoptive family submit regular post adoption reports. The reports are due every year until your child reaches age 18. Your consultant can give you more information on the specific requirements. The social worker who completed your home study will complete the first two post adoption reports. It is imperative that you comply with the post adoption requirement. The reports are submitted to the Nepalese embassy in Washington, D.C., and the embassy reserves the right to visit your home at your expense if you have not complied with the post adoption requirement. Additionally, such reports serve as a means of ensuring the Nepalese government that U.S. families can provide wonderful homes for Nepalese children. Without the compliance of families after their adoption, future adoptions from Nepal by U.S. citizens could be jeopardized.

The Report on Intercountry Adoption of 2004 has an excellent answer for this question: “Even though adoption is a very normal, acceptable way to build a family, it still is unusual. Therefore, while family and friends can offer a great deal of support, they may not fully understand the questions and concerns of adoptive parents. Adoptive parent groups provide a network of people who share similar experiences. They too, have struggled with the decision to adopt, worked with strangers to find a child, readjusted their lives after placement, and dealt with the curiosity of strangers. Even though they may have traveled different paths to the point of adoption, and even though they may have adopted very different types of children, members of adoptive parent groups have one very important bond: they love and care for children who live with the painful fact that their birth parents could not or would not keep them. Helping children deal with this loss at different stages of life adds a unique dimension to adoptive parenting.

“Adoptive parent groups offer a safe and supportive place to raise questions, express uncertainty, vent frustration, brag about successes, and rejoice in the growth and healing of children. An additional benefit is the opportunity for adopted children to meet one another. For children who may believe that adoption has happened only to them, it can be very reassuring to meet other adoptees.”

Before leaving on your trip to Nepal, make an appointment for a complete physical examination of your child with a pediatrician experienced in the health issues of children adopted internationally. This appointment should be scheduled within a week of returning from Nepal.

The following testing is recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics for all children, regardless of age or country of origin:

• Complete history and physical, including developmental examination and vision and hearing testing

• Complete blood count with erythrocyte indices

• TSH screening

• Rapid plasma reagin (RPR) or VDLR for Syphilis

• Hepatitis B profile, including assays for HBsAg, anti- HBc, and anti-HBs

• Hepatitis C antibody and lead levels

• Mantoux (intradermal PPD) test with candida control

• Diphtheria and tetanus antibody testing, if low, or if child received fewer than 3 DPT vaccines, begin complete AAP immunization sequence

• Complete STD screening, if risk factors present

• HIV-1 and HIV-2 by ELIZA and by PCR

• Stool cultures for Salmonella, Shigella, Yersinia, and Campylobacter, if symptomatic

• Stool examination for ova and parasites

• Urinalysis

Contact your local county probate court and request two forms—the Application to Establish Delayed Registration of Foreign Birth and the Motion and Order for Delayed Registration of Foreign Birth—to apply for the child’s new state birth certificate and to change the child’s name and/or age.

You will then mail the completed forms, along with the requested documents, back to the court. The court will file your application and forward it on to Lansing (or your state capital). In order to change the child’s age, you will need a letter from your child’s dentist and doctor stating the child’s possible age range, and a letter from you stating the age desired and why you want the age changed. Please note that some counties may not allow you to file these forms until the child has maintained residence in the state for at least one year.

NOTE: Changing the child’s name or age or obtaining a new state birth certificate may vary in procedure from county to county and state to state. In some states, you may be required to readopt; in Michigan, you are not required to readopt. Contact your local county probate court for more information if you are not a Michigan resident.

You can apply for your child’s social security number at your local social security office. (For Michigan residents, please call 800.772.1213.) You will need your child’s new Michigan birth certificate, the final adoption decree in English, and his or her proof of citizenship (Certificate of Citizenship), which should be mailed to you automatically 45 to 60 days after arriving in the U.S.

If you choose to apply for the child’s social security number before obtaining the new birth certificate or before receiving the Certificate of Citizenship, you will have to return to the social security office once you have these items to change the name and age on the social security card or to update the child’s status.

Yes! New to AAI is a site that will allow you to create your own adoption-themed journal and post updates about your adoption journey that your family and friends can respond to with their own comments. Best of all, this service is free to families adopting through AAI.

Families adopting from China, Ethiopia, Guatemala, Haiti, Nepal, and Russia can customize their journal by choosing a country-specific background. These themes feature children’s artwork created with various types of artistic mediums or international artifacts and will give your adoption journal an international flair. Generic backgrounds are also available for families adopting from other countries.

Have photos that you would like to share? When you create a journal, you will be able to post an unlimited number of pictures to your journal for your family and friends to enjoy without ever leaving their homes. Because all journals are password-protected, you’ll be able to rest easy in the knowledge that only those who have your password will be able to view your postings. Once your journal is set up, simply share the site link and password with friends and family that you would like to keep updated about your adoption journey.

To start your journal today, visit http://www.adoptionjournals.org, or ask your international consultant for more information.